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Inouie
11-18-08, 12:25 PM
Co-ed Pleasure Parties and Sex Tips for the Guys to make their wives more creative in bed

This past Saturday, I did a super fun co-ed pleasure party for 6 couples in Castro Valley. They were such a fun group and we laughed alot. This group of friends have known each other a long time and so they were very comfortable with each other and have been friends since elementary school in some cases. Just very fun, very normal people and we had a blast.
It brought up some fun ideas that I preach a lot at the parties and on my blog. Plus, it reminded me of some MESSAGING I should spend more time putting out there. I forget that sometimes men think that Bliss Pleasure Parties are all about girls finding toys that replace them. SO NOT TRUE! Bliss Pleasure Parties are all about helping men and women improve their sex life and their romantic life. I always joke that toys are the appetizers, men are the entrees. (That can be true for all types of relationships - MW, WW, MM, MWM, WMW, etc. )
A sex toy can never replace a real, warm, living, breathing person. Not even the real doll can do all of that stuff.
So, guys, we are not MAN HATERS.....we are SEX and ROMANCE lovers at Bliss. We do not want to help your wife replace you with a rabbit. We want you to use the rabbit together! Yes, it lights up, twists, vibrates and pulses. No, you cannot do that. But, imagine using the toy that lights up, twists, vibrates, and pulses while you are in an embrace with your lover - looking into her eyes, your lips on hers, your arm around her while you use the toy "on her" with your free hand. Sure, sometimes you can be in the "catchers" position, too, but most women would much prefer ot use the toy WITH you - not alone and not as a replacement for you.
So, that leads me back to the other topic I have blogged about before which is the "It's so easy, guys, here's how you get your wife or girl friend to have more creative sex with you" rant! The co-ed party reminded me of that rant and I am going to go over it again here. This is especilaly great for your MARRIEDS and for those of you who have been in a relationship for a long time. If you want to have more creative and more passionate sex with your partner follow my advice:
1. If your wife or girlfriend knows you think she is SUPER HOT and that you LOVE every inch of her body and find her super attractive even after 2 babies, cellulite, crows feet or whatever she is worried about - she will be more CONFIDENT. If she thinks you think she is HOT HOT HOT she will be more open to wearing the lingerie in the day light... know what I mean? If she hears you expressing to her often that you sincerely think her mature breasts are hot and that you lover her new hair style - she will feel so much more comfortable in her own skin and I am positive you will find her much more confident in the bedroom.
So be more expressive. When she is cooking dinner, tell her how sexy she looks in her work clothes. When she comes home from a day out with the girls, notice her new pedicure and compliment her. When she is not showering that day and wears her hair in a pony tail, be sure to whisper in her ear how she looks "au naturale." If you notice the details and give her sincere compliments - she will pay more attention to those little details and will reward you in the best way. SINCERE FLATTERY WILL GET YOU EVERYWHERE.
2. HELP MORE. I talk to thousands of women every year via our Pleasure Parties and our online romance store and the one thing I hear women saying is the reason they don't have more sex is because they are TOO TIRED. They are so sleep deprived, they would rather sleep an extra 15 minutes then to be intimate. So, my tip to you is HELP MORE.
Google PORN FOR WOMEN some time. You know what you will find? Sexy pics of men cleaning the toilet, folding laundry, unloading the dishwasher.....YES. We find that HOT HOT HOT. We call it "choreplay" rather then "foreplay." A woman who feels bitter and tired is not going to be that scorching hot VIXEN in the bedroom you are dreaming of. If you help her out a bit more with the kids, the house, or whatever is stressing her out - she will have more space in her brain to think creatively and plan romantic or kinky nights of fun for the two of you. I hear it over and over again, gents. They are too tired to remember to put on lingerie or plan a naughty date night...so help some more and it will go a LONG way to a more satisfied and less bitter sex partner.
3. MORE ORAL for her and if she is really really not comfortable with receiving (I mean she is truly not comfortable) then you must insist that you always give her an orgasm first and then you have yours or have one together later. (We know you will get yours one way or another.) Most women need a warm up. We are teenaged girls at heart.
4. MORE KISSING We like to kiss, make out, dry hump, you have to engage our brains in this endeavour. Our mouth is the closest sex organ to our brain... use it for more then just receiving oral. Be sure to utilize our mouth, neck, ears, brain, and give us an orgasm first. I am sure you have noticed on more then one occasion that women become MUCH more expressive and responsive to hot sex once they've had one small orgasm. (We tend to get enthusiastic once we have been included in the process! Think ravenous, vampy, nasty wife here, guys. Especially if you are kissing her neck saying sweet and naughty things in her ear. Women are AURAL men are VISUAL.)
I have a theory that women who say they are not comfortable with receiving oral sex are really saying "I am not comfortable just receiving" and are not comfortable being "selfish" and just receiving your oral gift. (Obviously, some women just hate it for whatever reason.) But, most women have a difficult time just TAKING. (I said TAKING not TALKING! LOL.) Think about your own relationship. I bet the "score" is way out of whack and you have received MUCH MORE oral then you have given. I hear it constantly at the parties when I am alone with the girls taking their orders. "Oh I am much more comfortable giving then receiving" and when I really drill down and start asking the questions, it turns out they just don't know how to relax and receive this lovely gift.
Giving a woman oral sex is one of the easiest ways to give her an orgasm. Most women can't have an orgasm during intercourse unless their clitoris is stimulated at the same time. 95% of women have 98% of their orgasms from clitoral stimulation. ORAL SEX IS ALL CLITORAL STIMULATION so get to work, boys! It's going to come back to you- I promise. Pay it forward. Oral sex is one of the HIGHEST compliments you can give your lover.
So let's review (I am in naughty teacher mode today I think) , COMPLIMENT her sincerely alot so she knows you think she is hot. BUILD HER CONFIDENCE. HELP HER more so she is not so tired and bitter all the time. KISS HER and give her MORE ORAL or atleast the first orgasm and then see what happens! Reply to my blog and let me know if my plan worked for you!
Those are 4 SUPER easy things to do to improve your sex life. I know it will pay off huge for all of you guys and you can thank me later!
If you want to read my blog about NO POINTY TONGUES EVER...search my blog for oral sex technique tips. (HINT: We like your entire tongue in our mouth and on our genitals. We like it when you keep it thick, fat, and use the entire surface area of your tongue. Do not listen to Howard Stern and point your tongue and do the ABC's on our clitoris! We like you to use your entire tongue!)
If you want to click on my shopping site, you can read more about how to give better oral for him and for her here: Bliss Connection - sex toys, vibrators, erotic books, adult DVDs, stripper pole, Kama sutra (http://www.blissconnection.com/) and check out our books "Blow Him Away","The Low Down on Going Down," and "Tickle His Pickle." All great books on how to give better oral sex to your partner.

Blissfully, Chrystal The Toy Diva