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[Lei Lei]

Kids in America Raising

People fear what they do not understand. Not understanding a culture, a person, a lifestyle, with cause a person to shy away from others. People are people and you will find white that will do what a black or a person from the Caribbean do. It's not where they are from its, who they are, how they grew up and their environment.

The first child, is always the hardest. You're not sure what do. You're not sure if your doing it right. You don't want to fail. If you're young, people keep telling what to do or you're not doing it right. The bottom line is this, when you laid down you became grow. When the child got here, ready or not you are not a full fledged adult. I say that to mean, now is time for sacrifices. Now, in this world there is someone greater than you. Someone, that at times you will have to put you aside. You know, the KISS method is a good one to imply. Keep It Simple Sister. (I know there are males out there doing it too. KIS.)

What you didn't like coming up don't do.

What you did like, you do.

What they need, you give.

Where you are weak, make them strong.

Where you are strong, keep them strong.

Teach them, research for them, make them better than you.

Remember

0 to 9 Kids do as they are told

10 to 13 They Think about disobeying their parents

14 to 18 They disobey their parents

19 to 26 You can't tell them nothing because they think they are grown

27 to 30 They start reassessing, been there done that what now.

31 to 39 They land the first real job, first mate, buy that first true expensive car, put the down payment on their first house, have 2 to 4 kids

40 Enjoy life or go through mid life crisis. Those who have at least 3 of the prior age

group items enjoy life. Those who do not have at least 3 of the prior age group items go through mid life crisis.

41 to 55 Have been on their job at least 5 years, car is paid for and might have gone into

leasing higher end cars, take mini vacations 4 days 3 nights like around memorial

day, labor day, presidents day, Christmas, New Years's not including there regular

base vacation of 2 to 6 weeks from their job, maybe first grandchildren

56 to 70 Starting to plan retire options, house should be close to being paid for

Remember January 1 is an American excuse to drink New Years Eve. Treat your birthday like its New Years, and evaluate where you are or your children are according, the ages above.

Remember there are at least five facets

Education You should do early on to get out the way

Mystery 10 years, it doesn't need to be all at once to mess up - make mistakes

Family Life Find a partner, Have Kids

Work Work

Personal Time to do you, Have fun. Stay Sane

Keep love in your heart.

Think of things you've been through, your fears, your loves, your lost.

Teach your kids to judge people based on the person and their characteristics. Granted don't get me wrong, in the neighborhood I live in is gang infested, so in my neighborhood, my kids aren't allowed to have friends. The reason I say this is because two of my sons are 9 and 8. The reason that they are not allowed to play with kids in my neighborhood is because I don't have time when they are 13 + to start telling them that they can not play with kids that they have been playing with since the age of 6. You see, the way I figure, if their house hold is affiliated, later on down the line those children will be to. Now, so that my kids could have friends, their friends, are friends that have parents like me. Hard. Their friends are their friends from the sports they play. The school they go to. Don't get me wrong, they speak to the kids in our neighborhood, they just don't play with them. It doesn't mean they are better, but they will have a better chance to get out. One of the tricks is "personal development. One must learn how to make the best of every day and every opportunity. One must stay away from nostalgia and thinking the grass is always greener on the other side."

Is it fair, maybe not for my kids not to have friends in the neighborhood?. Will they appreciate it in the long run. Definitely. How do I know, my first born is about to graduate high school, with not only her high school diploma, but with her Drafting License. She also, got a four year Presidential Scholarship for Engineering.

One can categorize friendship by demoting some from being a friend. Not everyone is a friend. Some are just acquaintance or an associate. Then a Friend. This is who you pick for you and yours and that of your child. Just because you know everyone, doesn't mean everyone necessarily need to be yours or your child's friend.

There is not a blue print to raising a child here in America or anyone else for that matter. Just do what you know, you can look in the mirror and can live with. Do what you know will allow you to sleep at night after you pray. Most importanly,

Make Them Better Than You.